Navigating Wealth Conversations with Adult Children

Their financial lives become more complex, and your own planning may involve decisions that affect them. Many parents want to be thoughtful about how and when to discuss wealth, but it can be hard to know where to start.

There is no single right way to approach these conversations. Some families prefer to keep financial information private until later in life. Others choose to share more details earlier so their children understand the family’s values and long‑term plans. Most families fall somewhere in the middle. What matters most is finding an approach that feels comfortable for you and appropriate for your children.

Why These Conversations Matter Today

The financial environment continues to evolve, and tax laws that affect wealth transfer can change from year to year. Federal estate tax, gift tax, and Generation-Skipping Tax (GST) exemption amounts are adjusted periodically, which often prompts families to revisit their long‑term planning.

At the same time, young adults are navigating a range of financial pressures, including:

• rising costs of living, especially housing, healthcare, and education
• increased financial complexity as they take on careers, families, and long‑term decisions
• a general sense of being unprepared for future financial responsibilities

Parents are also facing planning considerations of their own, such as:

• longer life expectancies and the need to plan for future care
• the current estate and gift tax environment
• the increasing role of digital accounts, passwords, and online assets in estate administration

These realities make clear communication more important than ever, even if the conversation begins at a high level.

Start with Your Comfort Level

Before sharing financial information, it can be helpful to think about your own comfort level and what you hope these conversations will accomplish. Some parents want to reinforce values such as responsibility or generosity. Others want to reduce uncertainty for their children or make sure they know whom to contact if something unexpected happens.

It’s also useful to consider your children’s readiness. Some adult children manage their finances confidently, while others may still be learning. Siblings may be at different stages. Thinking through these differences can help you decide how much to share and when.

What to Share and When to Share It

These conversations do not need to happen all at once. Many families start with broad concepts and gradually move toward more specific information. A staged approach can help the conversation feel natural rather than overwhelming. Families often begin by sharing:

• the values and intentions that guide their planning
• the roles and responsibilities children may have in the future
• who the family’s financial advisor is and how they can help
• general expectations around future decisions
• more detailed numbers or documents when children are ready or when life events make the timing appropriate

Some parents share more as major milestones occur, such as marriage, homebuying, or the arrival of a grandchild. Others prefer to wait until their own planning is fully settled. There is no single timeline; the right approach depends on your comfort level, your children’s readiness, and the nature of your financial plan.

A Few Key Areas to Begin the Conversation

While there are many facets to wealth conversations, the topics below often serve as natural starting points. They allow you to begin the discussion without feeling like you need to cover everything at once.

Lifetime Gifting

If you’re considering transferring wealth during your lifetime, today’s rules offer several options. In 2026, the annual gift tax exclusion allows you to give up to $19,000 per recipient, per year without using your lifetime exemption[1]. Some families also choose to gift appreciated assets, such as low‑basis stock, which may allow gains to be taxed at a potentially lower rate. Direct payments for tuition or medical expenses can also be made outside the annual exclusion.

These conversations can help children understand how taxes, investing, and long‑term planning work together.

Charitable Giving

Charitable giving can be a meaningful way to involve adult children in your values and priorities. Some families share the causes they support and why those causes matter to them. Others involve their children more directly, especially when using a donor‑advised fund (DAF). A DAF allows you to make contributions, receive a tax deduction, and recommend grants over time.

These discussions can help children understand the role philanthropy plays in your planning.

Intrafamily Loans

When adult children are exploring entrepreneurship or preparing for a major purchase, an intrafamily loan can be a structured way to provide support. The IRS publishes Applicable Federal Rates (AFRs) monthly, which set the minimum interest rate for these loans. Documenting the loan with a promissory note and repayment schedule helps ensure it is treated as a loan rather than a gift.

This approach can support your child while maintaining clarity for everyone involved.

Introducing Your Children to Your Financial Team

Even if you prefer not to share specific numbers, it can be helpful for your adult children to know who your financial advisor is and how to reach them. This becomes especially important if something unexpected happens. Some families start with a brief introductory meeting or share educational materials to help children understand the advisor’s role. Others wait until a major life event creates a natural moment for the introduction.

The goal is simply to make sure your children know where to turn when they need guidance.

Health, Wellness, and Future Care

Conversations about your future care preferences can be just as important as financial discussions. Adult children often want clarity on how you envision your later years, how you plan to fund future care, and what role, if any, you expect them to play. These discussions may help reduce uncertainty and help your children understand your wishes.

This Is Only the Beginning

The topics above represent just a few of the many areas families may want to explore. Other conversations may include:

• how you think about fairness among siblings
• your intentions for future inheritance
• the role of trusts in your planning
• digital assets and online accounts
• decisions around family business or real estate
• the values that guide your long‑term goals

Every family is different, and the right approach depends on your comfort level, your children’s readiness, and your broader goals. Modera works with families to create a thoughtful, individualized approach — one that supports your planning while helping your children build confidence and understanding.